The rule of three in the battle against sin

Posted on May 22nd, 2012 by Dan Burke

Q: Dear Dan, I am struggling with a recurring problem with anger that I can’t seem to overcome. I have read books, tried to understand how it surfaces in me, prayed fervently (I am living in a state of grace outside of this problem). But I seem to be making no progress. I am very very very very very very very very frustrated.

A: Yours is a challenging question. Because of the complex issues involved with this issue and my lack of knowledge of anything about you personally, I can’t give you a specific answer. I can however, point you to principals that I have no doubt will in some way help you face and overcome this challenge.

After years of observing intelligent, capable, and committed people work to solve problems, I have come to discover a rule that is almost universally true. Those who use this rule will be significantly more likely to overcome the challenges they face, those who don’t, will likely find themselves frustrated, dejected, and shackled with recurring sin and the debilitating and often disastrous consequences.

The rule itself is simple but it depends on a handful of basic realities that are worth a brief moment of exploration.

1. Sin clouds the heart and mind. Small sins and imperfections, left unchecked, cause a gradual and often unnoticed degeneration of the mind and will. Thus, when someone is caught in a destructive cycle, they often do not have, within themselves, the necessary faculties to identify the root cause, isolate it, formulate a solution, and then implement that solution.
2. We humans are finite creatures. We come into this world with blind spots. Even in the garden before our natures were tainted by sin, we had blind spots. In our perfect state, these were merely dependencies on one another to allow the other to see what the other could not see and to serve them in their need. In our fallen state, these blind-spots and dependencies can and do morph into serious realms of spirtiual delusion and dsyfunction. Post fall, with respect to serious emotional, psychological, and spiritual problems, it is very rare that we can effectively identify and overcome them on our own.

What can we do about these limitations and challenges? Well, the traditional means of the sacraments, prayer, spiritual reading, etc. are essential. Even so, many people are still stuck in their spiritual battles even after years of faithful practice of these life-giving disciplines. Other, less commonly used but very powerful tools are the combination of a rule of life coupled with a daily examen. Together these dramatically increase our spiritual peripheral vision by making us more self-aware (these practices consistently utilized can also help to shed light on our root sin). These tools help us to become more cognisant of our blind-spots and delusion not because we begin to see them clearly but because we see the patterns of the outcomes more clearly. Remember, you can never clearly see exactly what it is in your blind-spot.

Even with these wise and helpful practices, many people still are stuck in their spiritual growth. Why? It is because they don’t practice this simple rule:

If, with full vigor and commitment, we attempt to overcome a pattern of sin, imperfection, or any other major personal challenge three times without clear success or significant progress, we must seek outside help to properly diagnose and solve the problem.

Here’s an insight to the solution to this problem from God the Father given to St. Catherine of Sienna on the inherent incompleteness of our design and our clear need for others (Dialogue #7):

The same is true of many of my gifts and graces, virtues and other spiritual gifts, and those things necessary for the body and human life. I have distributed them all in such a way that no one has all of them. Thus I have given you reason – necessity, in fact – to practice mutual charity. For I could well have supplied you with all your needs, both spiritual and material. But I wanted to make you dependent on one another…

So, we are designed with a fundamental need for one another. Humility, mutual dependence and charity, are absolutely necessary for our spiritual growth; they are absolutely necessary for us to overcome serious spiritual challenges. Our culture, fueled by the lies of the enemy, militate against these holy needs and seek to replace them with the anti-virtues of pride, independence, and hyper-individualism. These ant-virtues coupled with fear and vanity have locked up and destroyed many people of good-will who simply would not reach out and get help with the challenges they face.

Jesus said that He came to give us life and that more abundantly. Reach out for that life that he offers to you. Don’t settle for less. Get the help you need.

 

PS: For more in-depth treatment of these ideas, you can pre-order Dan’s book, Navigating the Interior Life – Spiritual Direction and the Journey to God. It is scheduled to be available later in 2012.

I am stuck in my spiritual growth… how do I get unstuck? This is frustrating! Part II of II

Posted on May 21st, 2012 by Sister Carmen Laudis OCD

Q: Dear Sister Carmen, I feel like I am stuck in mansion somewhere in mansion one or two. Is this normal? Where do most people get stuck in the journey through the mansions and is there any common way you can suggest that we get unstuck? Maybe I am just impatient. I feel like I should be growing but I am not.

In our first post in this two part series we talked about a few of the reasons we get stuck and touched on the key issues we often face in the first three mansions. In this post, we will provide a little summary of the first three mansions through a brief examination of conscience may help to determine just where you “feel stuck”. Perhaps the following will be of some help.

Since one enters the Castle through the gate of prayer the person entering the first mansion already feels drawn to prayer. Teresa does not talk much about prayer in the first three mansions but she does talk about what may help or hinder prayer.

First Mansion

• How generous are you in the development of your prayer life?

• Are you growing in the poverty of self-knowledge which in turn helps you to know God better?

• What for you are occasions of sin and what determined means do you take to avoid them?

• How frequently do you avail yourself of the sacrament of confession?

Second Mansion

• How are you strengthening the practice of virtue?

• Is your prayer becoming more simplified?

• Are you growing in a healthy concept of perfection?

• Do you quiet your own voice in order to discern the gentle voice of God?

• Do you seek guidance in learning to conform your will to God’s?

Third Mansion

In the third mansion we see that true conformity with God’s Will is reached only when our “false gods” (centers of our lives) die and integration takes place not only in relation among these centers, but new life emerges as a result. “Unless the seed falls into the ground and dies…”

• Are you desirous not to offend God even by venial sin?

• Do you eagerly perform penance?

• Do you spend quality time in prayer?

• Do you use your time well?

• Is your life orderly?

• Do you practice works of charity?

Teresa speaks of seven mansions or main rooms. But there are rooms within each mansion. Our movement within these “rooms” is fluid not static. Although we may spend more time in one room than in another we tend to move in and out and may have brief glimpses of rooms to come, if the Lord chooses.

This whole process is about change or transformation. Change can take place only through our generosity and willingness to surrender. In the example of our butterfly above there are four main life cycles: 1) the egg or beginning stage; 2) the caterpillar or growth stage; 3) the chrysalis or transformation stage; and 4) the adult or perfected stage. We might compare the growth stage here of the caterpillar to the first three mansions. Without this growth the transformation might never take place and thus perfection would be stunted.

This is all a preparation for what lies beyond the first three mansions which is God’s to give not ours to produce.

 

PS: To learn more about the Carmelite Sisters visit our web site: www.carmelitesistersocd.com and for more information please contact the sisters at contact@carmelitesistersocd.com, or 626-289-1353 Ext. 246, 920 East Alhambra Road, Alhambra, California 91801.

Who are you?

Posted on May 1st, 2012 by Dan Burke

You are God’s child (John 1:12)

You are Christ’s friend (John 15:15)

You are a member of Christ’s Body (1 Corinthians 12:27)

You are a citizen of heaven (Philippians 3:20)

You are hidden with Christ in God (Colossians 3:3)

You are His chosen one in Him before the creation of the world (Ephesians 1:4, 11)

You are adopted as his child (Ephesians 1:5)

You are in Him (Ephesians 1:7; 1 Corinthians 1:30)

You are forgiven (Ephesians 1:8; Colossians 1:14)

You are a person with purpose (Ephesians 1:9 & 3:11)

You are included (Ephesians 1:13)

You are sealed with the promised Holy Spirit (Ephesians 1:13)

You are salt and light of the earth (Matthew 5:13-14)

You are God’s coworker (2 Corinthians 6:1)

You are alive with Christ (Ephesians 2:5)

You are raised up with Christ (Ephesians 2:6; Colossians 2:12)

You are seated with Christ in the heavenly realms (Ephesians 2:6)

You are God’s workmanship (Ephesians 2:10)

You are near to God through Christ’s blood (Ephesians 2:13)

You are a special guest of the Father (Ephesians 2:18)

You are a member of God’s household (Ephesians 2:19)

You are secure (Ephesians 2:20)

You are a holy temple (Ephesians 2:21; 1 Corinthians 6:19)

You are a dwelling for the Holy Spirit (Ephesians 2:22)

You are a light to others, and can exhibit goodness, righteousness and truth (Ephesians 5:8-9)

You are dead to sin (Romans 1:12)

You are not alone (Hebrews 13:5)

You are growing (Colossians 2:7)

You are His disciple (John 13:15)

You are united with other believers (John 17:20-23)

You are not in want (Philippians 4:19)

You are victorious (I John 5:4)

You are set free (Romans 8:2; John 8:32)

You are a light in the world (Matthew 5:14)

You are more than a conqueror (Romans 8:37)

You are safe (I John 5:18)

You are part of God’s kingdom (Revelation 1:6)

You are no longer condemned (Romans 8:1, 2)

You are not helpless (Philippians 4:13)

You are overcoming (I John 4:4)

You are persevering (Philippians 3:14)

You are protected (John 10:28)

You are a new creation (2 Corinthians 5:17)

You are delivered (Colossians 1:13)

You are redeemed from the curse of the Law (Galatians 3:13)

You are qualified to share in His inheritance (Colossians 1:12)

You are chosen and dearly loved (Colossians 3:12 along with the entire Bible and Tradition of the Church)

 

What does St. Teresa mean by “pesky reptiles”?

Posted on February 21st, 2012 by Sister Carmen Laudis OCD

Q: Dear Sister Carmen, In the Interior Castles St. Teresa talks about “pesky reptiles” and other creatures. What exactly does she mean when she is saying these things?”

A: Those “pesky reptiles!” When you come across a snake unexpectedly, what is your immediate reaction? Well, unless you are a herpetologist it is probably fear, dread or surprise. Let me share with you the reaction of a group of Sisters with one such encounter several years ago.

We had attended Mass at an abbey and were looking for a place to have our lunch on the grounds. We began walking down the path of the Stations of the Cross looking for some benches. At that particular time of the year the grasses and wild flowers had grown to waist level on both sides of the path. Thus, the path had become very narrow, so much so that we had to walk single file. I was in the lead and looking up at some birds flying overhead and not paying attention to the path I was on. The Sister behind me in a sweet gentle voice said, “Oh, look at that snake.” Thinking it was well ahead on the path, I replied, “Where?” She answered, “Right there.” I looked down and about a foot in front of me was the largest diamondback rattler I had ever seen. Its head was well out on the path but most of its body was concealed in the grasses. I froze! Everyone stopped and I said, “That’s a rattlesnake; back up slowly!” Everyone began taking steps backwards.

When we were out of danger, I turned and the Sister who was last in line was nowhere to be seen. She is normally a very slow mover but we found her later by the van, a good distance away. We were very happy that she did not have the van keys or she might have left us behind. We doubled over laughing not only because of her but because of the gentle sweet message we had received about the danger in our path.

Knowing our human nature, Teresa uses an image that is repulsive for most of us: snakes and poisonous creatures – not because they are bad in themselves – but because they can become a danger to us if we do not understand what we are dealing with and do not take the necessary precautions.  Teresa tells us that these creatures live outside the castle in their normal habitats, but they can manage to squeeze into the castle when we enter, just as creatures which live in our yards manage to find their way into our homes.

The creatures to which St. Teresa refers here are “worldly things” – whatever can be an occasion of sin or a danger for us. In the first mansion, we are less aware of the danger before us since we are just beginning a serious life of prayer and not as spiritually attuned to the voice of the Holy Spirit. This room is also cold and dim and our spiritual eyes do not recognize the perils around us. Progress is slow but if we stay with it, allowing God to do His work in us, we gradually enter the second Mansion.  But a number of these “pesky reptiles” manage to come in with us.

Both the first and the second mansions are “rooms of humility.” If Adam and Eve could so easily be convinced by the reasoning of Satan then our wounded nature can undoubtedly be misled. Although the second mansion is not as dark and cold as the first, the hard work required here, the discouragement and impatience with ourselves, and our self-condemnation can cause us to look back and try to return to the previous room. We are still too close to the “world” and its allurements and comfort levels can entice us back. If Satan can induce us to return to the First Mansion, then it will not be too long before he convinces us to leave the castle altogether.

These two rooms of humility are also the rooms of self-knowledge. Unless we know ourselves well we are not in a position to recognize the menaces that can endanger us and draw us off the right path. The difficulty in recognizing what becomes for us an occasion of sin is the proficiency with which we rationalize our choices and behavior.

The second mansion requires great determination and determination is the resolve to move. But to move, we must take a step in some direction. A holy card I have shows a newly hatched fluffy chick standing and looking forward. The verse beneath it states, “Trust is at the beginning of everything: it precedes every step and at every step lights up the way.”

Will we trust God sufficiently to keep our gaze looking ahead, to step forward courageously, and to tune out all voices which are not in conformity with His?

PS: To learn more about the Carmelite Sisters visit our web site: www.carmelitesistersocd.com and for more information please contact the sisters at contact@carmelitesistersocd.com, or 626-289-1353 Ext. 246, 920 East Alhambra Road, Alhambra, California 91801.

How can I get out of patterns of sin!?

Posted on November 15th, 2011 by Sister Carmen Laudis OCD

Q. Dear Sister Carmen, how can I deepen my relationship with God when I am stuck in patterns of sin that I can’t seem to break? I’ve asked this question to several people at different times, but I really can’t seem to figure this out or make any progress. I am really grieved over this. Thank you for your help.

A. It seems to me that your grief over patterns of sin is already the beginning of conversion and spiritual growth. Recall the story of the Prodigal Son in Luke 15:18-19 when the son realizing his sinful situation says, “I will arise and go to my father and I will say to him, “Father, I have sinned against heaven and before you; I am no longer worthy to be called your son; treat me as one of your hired servants.’”

Your question obviously indicates that you have good desires and the fact that you are sincere in yearning to deepen your relationship with God presupposes that you have already established a relationship with Him. Our good desires, however, must include self-knowledge and humility.

Self-knowledge opens to us the reality of the mystery and ugliness of sin as well as to the mystery and beauty of grace. Teresa envisioned the human soul as a castle containing many rooms. Outside the castle there was darkness and fearsome reptiles and creatures trying to impede our way into the castle. The key to the entry of the castle is prayer and reflection.

Once inside we become aware of light emanating from the deepest center, that innermost room, where dwells the Glory of God. However, some of these fearsome creatures manage to squeeze in with us, for they are the temptations, the bad habits, the patterns of sin that accompany us and although the Light continues to stream from the center of the castle, we still experience darkness for that which accompanies us into the castle blocks the light trying to reach us.

There is much work to be done in the first room. We wage a daily battle between the person we wish to be, the person we really are and the person God created us to be. To come to self-knowledge we must be very willing to be honest and this requires humility. What am I really like? How do others see me? Do I spend my time trying to be someone I am not? Do I feel guilty being who I am? How much of the false values of the world around me have I absorbed?

The Prodigal Son was lured away from his loved ones by the false promises of happiness. It wasn’t until he had hit rock-bottom that he realized that he had sacrificed an authentic relationship with himself, with others, and with God for fleeting pleasures. Only when he ran out of money and his “friends” deserted him was he able to see the superficiality of his life.

Each of us needs to identify the vipers and poisonous creatures that block our passageway as we seek to move through the castle into the other rooms seeking the One who waits for us at the Center just as the father of the Prodigal Son, in the center of his home, looked longingly for his son’s return day after day until one day he saw him coming in the distance.

• Can I identify the blockages that hinder my movement forward?:

• What external occupations fill my mind causing me to neglect prayer and reflection?

• Am I addicted to noise (e.g. music, television, radio, etc.)?

• Am I afraid of solitude filling the emptiness within me with busy-ness?

• What patterns of sin do I need to break and what concrete measures am I taking to help myself?

• Do I make use of the sacramental graces provided by frequent confession?

• Have I considered the help of a spiritual director to assist me in breaking the pattern of sin and to aid me in practicing virtue?

What elements in my life am I willing to surrender in order to remain in and be attentive to God’s Presence?

It was only when the Prodigal Son made a firm decision to “arise” and go to his father that he began the journey that would take him to the treasure he had not recognized. As the father waited patiently for his son’s return, so also God is even more patient as we move through the rooms leaving behind us the paltry treasures we have accumulated in order to find the Pearl of Great Price at the center. Are we willing to sell all for this Treasure?

Until next time,

Sr. Carmen Laudis OCD

PS: To learn more about the Carmelite Sisters visit our web site: www.carmelitesistersocd.com and for more information please contact the sisters at contact@carmelitesistersocd.com, or 626-289-1353 Ext. 246, 920 East Alhambra Road, Alhambra, California 91801.