What if I have nothing to confess, should I still go to confession?

Q: Dear Father John, I recently heard someone mention the term “devotional confession.”  I think this is what I need, but I am not sure what it really is.  Is this the kind of confession we do when we are no longer living with habitual mortal or venial sins? Is this where we re-confess old sins to gain the benefit of the sacrament?  But if it is, isn’t that scrupulosity?  Any guidance will be appreciated.

A: Your question, it seems to me, can be summarized like this: How can I receive the graces of confession when I am not falling into obvious sin (the kind I used to experience so often)?  This is a good question, because of a widespread bad habit.  The bad habit is thinking that confession only exists for those times when we sin so grievously that we experience a spiritual earthquake.  Without a doubt, this is the primary purpose of the sacrament – to open a way of reconciliation for a baptized Christian who has fallen into grave sin.  But popes and spiritual writers in recent centuries have repeatedly and energetically encouraged all of us to practice frequent, regular confession.  Blessed Mother Teresa of Calcutta used to go to confession weekly, as did Pope John Paul II.  Obviously, these giants of the faith weren’t confessing mortal sins every week, so what was the reasoning behind their practice of frequent, regular confession?

Benefits of Frequent Confession

Every sacrament imparts its own particular grace.  The sacramental grace of confession is primarily the forgiveness of sins, but it is also, secondarily, the spiritual strengthening of the soul.  This is why it is called a sacrament of healing.  It heals (reconciles) our relationships with God and with the Church, which have been wounded or broken by personal sin, and at the same time strengthens those relationships.  When we break a bone, the body will repair it with an extra dose of calcium, so that the bone is actually stronger at the break point after the healing than it was before the injury.  Something similar happens with confession.  God pours out his strengthening grace in a special way on the aspects of our spiritual organism, so to speak, that we present to him in confession.

Now you can understand why the devil works so hard to keep us away from frequent, regular confession.  If our relationship with God has been ruptured (by mortal sin), he doesn’t want it reconciled.  But even if it has just been wounded (venial sin), he doesn’t want it strengthened.

This sacrament, however, proffers even more benefits to the soul than the sacramental graces of forgiveness and strengthening.  Making a good confession requires the arduous task of self-reflection.  Ongoing self-examination is, all spiritual writers agree, a basic ingredient in spiritual progress.  We have to discover, with God’s help, how miserable and needy we really are, spiritually speaking, in order to open ourselves confidently and eagerly to God’s action.  Going to confession is also like doing a major spiritual workout.  Through the process of self-examination, repentance, confession, and penance, we exercise every major spiritual-muscle group: the theological virtues (faith, hope, love for God), humility (it’s not exactly self-inflating to kneel down and systematically expose our faults and failings), justice, prudence, fortitude (it takes courage to step into a confessional), and self-denial.  This sacrament is like a gymnasium of Christian virtue.  Frequent and regular workouts therein will do wonders for our spiritual health.

What to Confess?

Now we can come to the nitty-gritty of your question.  Any valid confession will inundate your soul with these benefits, and the more conscientiously you participate in the sacrament, the better your workout will be.  To be valid, a confession needs both sincere repentance (which includes the intention of fulfilling your assigned penance), and the actual confession of sin.  When we have obvious sins on our conscience, that it is easy.  But as we grow in the spiritual life, the obvious sins tend to diminish.  When that happens, we need to examine ourselves more carefully to uncover the hidden attitudes, judgments, and intentions that are still self-centered and not Christ-centered.  Scripture warns us that we do not know how deep our selfishness goes: “But who can detect his own failings?  Wash away my hidden faults” (Ps 19:12).  This is an excellent topic to discuss in spiritual direction.

Yet sometimes we identify failings that were not willful; we just fell into them out of weakness or lack of reflection.  Here we can enter a gray area between venial sin, for which we are in some way directly responsible, and what spiritual writers call “imperfections,” for which we are only remotely responsible, if at all.  A good example of this is internally judging and criticizing other people.  Sometimes we notice ourselves doing that only after we have already been doing it for a few minutes, and we didn’t really consciously decide to start judging them.  It is an injustice, but it stems from deep-seeded selfish tendencies, not willful lack of charity (unless we keep doing it even after we notice we were doing it).

When the material of confession is in this gray area, it is a healthy practice to end the confession by referring to some past sins that were more obvious.  If they have already been confessed, we don’t need to confess them again in detail (that would, as you suggest, be a step towards scrupulosity), but bringing them anew to the Lord is an excellent way to show him that we are truly sorry for all of our sins and failings.  So, for example, if in the past your obvious sins had to do with theft, bribery, or fraud, you could finish your regular confession now by saying something like, “… I confess these sins [the ones you have already mentioned] and all the sins of my past life, especially those against the virtue of justice.  These are my sins.”

Now that we have explored some theoretical and practical aspects of regular, frequent confession, you may be wondering “How frequent and regular should my confession be?”  If Mother Teresa went weekly, that’s not a bad yardstick.  But that’s not always practical, and it may make you feel pressured.  Confession every two weeks will be a turbo boost to your friendship with Christ, and, in today’s corrosive culture, monthly confession is almost the minimum required for someone who is serious about spiritual progress.  But remember, the Church only requires us to go to confession annually, if we have a mortal sin on our conscience.  Frequent confession is not a duty imposed by the Church; it is simply a heartfelt, wise recommendation.

Yours in Christ, Fr John Bartunek, LC, ThD

Is it a sin to have bad thoughts? How do I deal with bad thoughts? How can I be sure to avoid the unforgivable sin?

Q: Thank you for your excellent series on scrupulosity. I have a question that relates to it, namely the occurrence of “bad thoughts” — thoughts that are negative, vile, or even blasphemous against any of the Three Persons of the Holy Trinity or Our Lady herself. I understand that these may occur in cases of psychological imbalance, or gross immaturity, for which I presume there is little culpability. In the context of those trying to develop their spiritual lives, bad thoughts appear to be temptations flashed before us by the devil as a form of spiritual warfare. My understanding is that since temptation is not a sin, the best course of action is to ignore them. In addition, because one is more prone to these thoughts when tired or hungry or under stress, good sense would indicate the importance of food, sleep, exercise, and prayer. But given that, what is the “dividing line,” so to speak? I love God and never remotely want to get close to the “unforgivable sin against the Holy Spirit,” yet these thoughts can be alarming. When and how does one confess them? How does one order the spiritual life to purity of thought?

A: Your question itself contains a lot of wisdom. Actually, it also contains a lot of questions (three, to be exact). Before answering them, we need to make one more distinction.

For someone who is already actively and sincerely trying to follow Christ, bad thoughts may be flashed directly by the devil, as you point out, but there may also be two other sources. First, they could flash up from our own subconscious. If someone has undergone a conversion (or reversion) after spending years in a self-centered, sinful lifestyle, echoes of that lifestyle will still reverberate under the surface of the mind. From time to time, they may break the surface and grasp at the conscious mind, trying to regain a hold on the will. In this case, the bad thoughts are not planted directly by the devil. If we resist these last gasps of our old habits, they will gradually lose energy and their appearances will decrease in frequency. Second, bad thoughts can be the result of carelessness. We are surrounded by non-Christian, and often un-Christian mental influences: images on the Web, billboards, and advertisements; ideas in news articles, movies, books, and television shows; anti-values woven into music and secular art. If we allow ourselves to imbibe these toxins, they will have their effect later on, stirring up thoughts that would pull us away from friendship with Christ.

Guarding the Castle

Thus, the first answer to your third question: we can grow in purity of thought by guarding our senses and minds from toxic input. This may seem a bit puritan in a pluralistic society, but it is only common sense. We are careful about the food we put into our body, because we know that it affects our physical health. We should be even more careful about what we purposely let into our minds and hearts, because that will affect our spiritual health. (Another favorite image used by spiritual writers is that of a drawbridge and a castle. You don’t let down the drawbridge when enemies come knocking; you keep it securely in place to protect the castle from invasion.)

A wife who regularly reads grocery-store romance novels (which are a subtle form of pornography), or who daily drinks in the titillating sensuality of your typical soap opera, is clogging her marital arteries and setting herself up for a spiritual heart attack. A husband who goes to strip bars “just for business,” spends more time with atheist buddies than with fellow Christ-seekers, and doesn’t take the initiative to protect himself from Internet pornography is not keeping in spiritual shape. In both cases, “bad thoughts” and blasphemous ideas will pop up more and more frequently, even without the devil’s direct provocation. In these cases, we are at least partially responsible for the evil thoughts that come up to tempt us, and we should confess this negligence in the sacrament of reconciliation, and God will give us strength to be more coherent.

Spiritual Self-Defense

One other tactic useful for developing purity of thought consists in responding positively to the bad thoughts that do come up, whatever their source. As you mention in your question, once we recognize the flash of a bad thought, the last thing we want to do is pay attention to it. If you can simply ignore it and get back to doing God’s will with your whole mind and heart, great. But if the bad thoughts are violent and insistent, ignoring them is not always easy. In those cases, we need to have a prearranged plan. We need to be ready to counteract them with prayer as we try to turn our attention back to God’s will. This can be a simple vocal prayer, like the Our Father or the Hail Mary. It can be a favorite verse from Scripture used as a shield against evil (e.g. “The Lord is my shepherd, I shall not want…” Ps 23:1). I recently heard the example of a man battling to overcome sexual temptations who committed himself to singing hymns until the sensual thoughts dispersed – he said that he ended up memorizing four whole verses to more than a dozen hymns in his efforts to grow in purity! If we fail to fight actively, with a spirit of faith, against the evil thoughts that tempt us, or if our efforts to fight them are lackadaisical, then we should confess this negligence in the sacrament of reconciliation, and God will give us strength to be more courageous.

Circumstantial Evidence

This brings us to your first question about where to draw the line. If you know that certain circumstances (the use of particular media, or physical tiredness and stress, as you mention) tend to increase the intensity, frequency, or seductive power of evil thoughts, you have a responsibility to make a decent effort to avoid those circumstances. Eighty hour work weeks may win you the promotion you covet, but is winning that promotion worth exposing yourself to the occasions of sin? Jesus didn’t think so: “What, then, will anyone gain by winning the whole world and forfeiting his life?” (Mt 16:26) At times, however, the circumstances are out of our control (needy babies make for sleepless nights). That’s when our Lord is inviting us to lean more fully on him, and on the means for perseverance that he gives us (the sacraments, prayer, healthy friendships, a loving spouse…).

If you are actively making a decent effort to do your part to live a Christ-centered, balanced life and to grow in purity of thought, and still the evil ideas and images plague you, they really do not qualify as material for confession. They are more like bad spiritual weather. In this sense, it is worth mentioning that many saints experienced violent and intense temptations to blasphemy towards the end of their lives, when they were well advanced in the spiritual life. The devil sent these temptations to cause confusion and to try and steal away their confidence in God and their peace of soul. If that happens to you, put up your umbrella of prayer and obedience to God’s will, and endure the storm for as long as the Lord allows it. As you do so, you will exercise all the major Christian virtues, thereby growing in holiness and building up the Church.

Yours in Christ, Father John Bartunek, LC

Scrupulosity Series

Dear friends, I have updated the Scrupulosity Series Links for easier access to all the posts on scrupulosity. Either click here or look to the far right column under Topical Series and click on the topic.

Seek Him – Find Him – Follow Him

Dan

Understanding and overcoming scrupulosity – Part II

Q: Father John, I seem to be struggling with scrupulosity.  However, when I read St. Teresa of Avila and St. John of the Cross, they exhort that any small sin or attachment can keep us from union with God.  How do I know if I am scrupulous or just sensitive to sin?  How do I avoid taking sin too lightly?  If I am scrupulous, how do I overcome it?

A: The word “scrupulous” comes from a Latin word meaning “pebble.”  Like a scale that registers the weight of even the tiniest pebble, the scrupulous conscience is thrown into doubts about its love for God and fidelity to God’s will by tiny faults or questions that, objectively, should not disturb its peace.  Scrupulous people feel intense anxiety after confession: “Did I confess everything?  Did I confess sincerely?  Did I explain everything sufficiently?”  They also often feel debilitating anxiety about whether or not they are truly in the state of grace, and whether they should receive communion (when we sincerely doubt whether we are in the state of grace, we should make as sincere an act of contrition as we can, and then receive holy Communion).  As we explained in the last post, this condition of over-sensitivity can cause great interior suffering.

Whether scruples arise from a combination of personality and circumstance, or whether they are more developed and a true trial allowed by God and sent by the devil, the direct remedy is the same.  It consists of practicing the virtue of obedience.  This is simpler for those in the religious life than in the lay life.  Nevertheless, the principle is the same.  Scrupulosity is like a temporary darkening of the conscience; one’s interior compass has gone haywire and you can’t tell what direction you are going in.  The only way out is to let oneself be guided by an objective party, a confessor or a spiritual director who knows how to listen, is experienced in the spiritual life and in guiding others, and whom you can trust solidly.   If you don’t have a regular confessor or spiritual director, but you find yourself suffering from scruples, that should be a good motivation to ask God to help you find one, then go looking.

The Task of Obedience
When you explain the situation to your director, explain fully why you think you suffering from scruples.  The director will listen to the description of your situation, ask some questions, and restate what you have said in such a way that they show they have understood clearly.  They may either confirm your suspicion that this is indeed a case of scruples, or they may offer another explanation – a misunderstanding about the difference between venial and mortal sin, a misunderstanding about the nature of a particular sin, another psychological factor… In either case, the key step for you is to obey.  Trust that God will use your director to guide you, as he has used directors to guide all the saints.  Your director will probably give you some very specific and firm points of work and instruct you to report on them.  For instance, as regards the sacrament of reconciliation, he may instruct you to confess specifically only your mortal sins, and to confess all your venial sins together, as a group.  He may instruct you to absolutely discard any doubts about whether you have sinned, practically ordering you to admit as sin only those actions where you have absolute, mathematical certitude.  He may instruct you, even without giving reasons (scruples can blind our capacity to reason clearly), never to confess again past sins that you have already confessed.  He may even tell you that if you do not trust him enough to obey, he will help you find another spiritual director whom you can trust.  These kinds of instructions may be hard for you to fulfill, but fulfill them you must, if you want to make your way though the dark valley of scrupulosity and emerge back into the interior peace of a healthy, balanced conscience.

The very nature of the cure, firm and faith-guided obedience to a trustworthy confessor or spiritual director, shows why God at times permits his children (us) to suffer this painful trial: it is an excellent workout for the virtue of humility, and it is a sure way to purify us from hidden attachments.

In our day and age, a lax and lazy conscience is more often met than a scrupulous one.  In either case, however, the first sign that we are deviating from the true path of moral and spiritual growth is usually inner turbulence.  Our God is a God of peace, and his peace goes deep.  When we lose it, that may be because we are trying to paddle through the shallow muskeg of an apparent shortcut.

Yours in Christ, Father John Bartunek

The Ten Commandments of Scrupulosity

Important Note: If you do not specifically struggle with scrupulosity, this advice is not likely to apply to you. If you have any questions about the advice or overcoming the struggle of scrupulosity, it is very important that you meet with your spiritual director for guidance.

1. You shall not repeat a sin in confession when it has been confessed in a previous confession, even when there is a doubt that it was confessed or a doubt that it was confessed in a sufficiently adequate and complete way.

2. You shall not confess doubtful sins in confession, but only sins that are clear and certain.

3. You shall not repeat your penance after confession or any of the words of your penance because you feel or think that you had distractions or may not have said the words properly.

4. You shall not worry about breaking your fast before receiving communion, unless you actually put food and drink in your mouth and swallow it in the same way that a person does when eating a meal.

5. You shall not hesitate to look at any crucifix or at any statue in church or at home or anywhere else because you may get bad thoughts in your mind and imagination. If such thoughts occur, they carry no sin whatever.

6. You shall not consider yourself guilty of bad thoughts, desires, or feelings, unless you can honestly swear before the all-truthful God that you remember clearly and certainly consenting to them.

7. You shall not disobey your confessor when he tells you never to make another general confession of past sins already confessed.

8. You shall believe and act accordingly, so that whenever you are in doubt as to whether or not you are obliged to do or not to do something, you can take it for certain that you are not obligated.

9. If, before you perform or omit an act, you are doubtful whether or not it is sinful for you, you shall assume as certain that it is not sinful and shall proceed to act without any dread of sin whatever.

10. You shall put your total trust in Jesus Christ, knowing that he loves you as only God can love, and that he will never allow you to lose your soul.

By Father Don Miller, C.SS.R.