Mary sees us

“Just try to imitate the Blessed Virgin,” my old pastor would always counsel me. This was when I was a teenager struggling with all the usual teenager sins. The only thing I could see that Mary and I had in common was the color blue: her mantle, my hair. So his advice, while technically excellent, was entirely unhelpful.

When I became a mother, I thought the imitation would come more naturally. But the opposite happened: The more I tried to imitate what I heard about Mary, the wider the gulf between us became. Imitate someone who was free from original sin, and so had no inclination to be impatient or sarcastic, self-pitying or lazy, lustful or arrogant? And whose Child, while clearly kind of a tricky case, never sinned either? Whose husband was a saint, and whose mission in life was clear as a bell?

And asking someone with four kids under the age of five to imitate a mother of one felt like asking someone who lives in a sod hut to be more like Martha Stewart. Imitate Mary? I might as well have tried to imitate a cirrus cloud, or pattern my life after a soap bubble or an innocent little butterfly. In Mary’s presence, I had to be on my best behavior, so as not to put a smudge on her pretty porcelain robes.

What baffled me was that so many other women clearly found such solace and strength in Mary. I knew that I must be missing something—that this wasn’t her fault, it was mine. I regretfully concluded that I just wasn’t one of those Mary People.

But my thinking has changed. Here’s the key: I was misunderstanding sin—and so, of course, misunderstanding Mary, conceived without sin.

Intellectually, I knew sin is the cause of all pain and suffering in the world; but emotionally, it just felt like sin was life. How could the Immaculate Conception be helpful at all with Real Life? I imagined Mary as a blank slate, a polished, glossy fondant of womanhood. Pretty to look at, but who can get a foothold in such a featureless landscape?

But here’s the thing. Mary was conceived without sin, but that clearly did not mean she didn’t suffer. Think of this: Sin, in a peculiar way, protects us. It makes a comfortable shield or buffer between us and the truth. When I hurt someone, I protect my conscience by telling myself that so-and-so deserved it, that I was tired or overworked, and not much to blame, that it wasn’t such a big deal, that I’ll do better next time, and so on.

If Mary, though, full of grace, saw someone hurting someone else, even in a minor way—she must have seen the full horror of it. Far from being dainty and pristine, detached and removed from the mess and struggle of the world, she must have seen with utter clarity what harm we do to each other, and to ourselves, and how we offend against God. Imagine a Civil War-era mother watching the battlefield from high ground: It’s all very well to be protected yourself, but how dreadful to witness all those wounds.

And then there is the matter of what happened to Mary’s Son. The closest I come to being a decent human being is when one of my children is hurt. That is when I’m most able to put aside my own needs and desires, and just do what I’m here to do: to help, to make it better, to work like a furious machine to right the wrong. This is because I love my children. I can see them better, I know them more than anyone else does—and because of what I know, I have the strength to fight for them.

So imagine Mary, who was the only one who could see her Child for who he really was—whose life was linked to His. Imagine not only seeing your child suffer, but knowing that he was the only truly innocent one in the world. A sword of sorrow is putting it mildly. In her immaculate state, she had no selfishness to work through, no “compassion fatigue”—only sheer, unmixed anguish at seeing the truth of the most outrageous injustice in the universe. Mary alone saw not only her Son’s suffering, but saw clearly how the whole world was wounding itself as it tortured and killed this innocent one. She was not shielded by sin; she saw.

Mary is not, in her immaculate state, detached from us. On the contrary, she sees us—she sees more than anyone else sees. This is why she loves us: not because she is nice enough to blink politely and pretend not to notice our human grotesqueries—but because she sees it all, the good and the bad. She knows us better than anyone else, and she loves us because of what she knows, not despite it. When we cry to her, she doesn’t gather up her mantle to keep it free of our filth—she scoops us up like any mother would, and holds us tight until we feel strong enough to stand on our own again.

And so this is how I pray to Mary: Help me see my children clearly. Help me to see as Mary sees. Sin blinds and divides us; but grace reveals, and grace gives us strength.

by Simcha Fisher: To read more from Simcha go to www.NCRegister.com

Do you have a minute?

Click here – pause - pray – and then send this post to someone you know who needs to take a minute too.

Here’s a tip, 1) click on the link, 2) take your hand off of the mouse (no, really, take it off), 3) okay, now, join that hand to your other hand…  you know the rest.

Mary, Mother of the Son – Book Recommendation

One of the greatest barriers to my conversion to Catholicism was Marian tradition. To be clear, it wasn’t Mary herself, it was common practice and teaching about Mary that was difficult for me to stomach. As recently as this summer I still had unresolved internal tensions regarding these traditions and my own daily commitment to properly honor her. I was still stuck between my protestant past and my Catholic present in this important area of the one true faith.

With that as a backdrop, in August of this year I had the divinely orchestrated opportunity to resolve some of my struggles by spending a number of hours (driving and getting lost together) with Mark Shea on the way to a Catholic New Media conference in Boston. The insights he shared were compelling and deeply beneficial. When we arrived at the event, he generously provided me a copy of his three volume work, Mary, Mother of the Son.

I began reading the first volume that night in my room. By the time I arrived back home from the trip a few days later I was surprised to find myself on the last page of volume one. Frankly, I couldn’t put the book down. In this complete and compelling work, Mark offers a rare combination of readability, scholarship, and wit that will keep you riveted to every page. His goal in writing the series was to provide one place where the average Catholic could find and understand all the important teachings on Marian doctrine and devotion. He has achieved that goal in grand fashion. Here’s a brief summary of each volume:

In Modern Myths and Ancient Truth you will discover the fascinating way in which Mary emerges with profundity, beauty, and love from the pages of Scripture in the light of apostolic teaching. You will probe how the gospel of Christ crowns and perfects, not only the Old Testament, but the deepest insights of the great non-Christian philosophies, religions, and myths. You can also learn how to read the Bible as the earliest Christians did and find out how Mary safeguards the deepest truths about Christ and his Church.

In First Guardian of the Faith you will learn about the biblical and apostolic roots of Mary’s title as Theotokos; as well as her Perpetual Virginity, Immaculate Conception, and Assumption into heaven. In addition, you will discover the astonishing relevance each of these teachings has, not only for the Christian believer, but for the twenty-first century as it comes to grips with such questions as the dignity, origin, and destiny of the human person.

In Miracles, Devotion, and Motherhood you will explore the devotional life of the Church: a life which includes the communion of saints, the holy rosary, the mysteries of private revelation and Mary’s God-given role as mother of all who believe in Christ.

This is a rare work that I believe every serious Catholic, without exception, must read. As for you, I suggest you buy it as a Christmas present for someone you love, or, for yourself!

Seek Him – Find Him – Follow Him,

Dan

PS: As always, please click here and purchase Mark’s books through this site so we will build credit to purchase and review other great books for you!

I am a convert and am struggling with the idea of praying to Mary, can you help? Part III

Q: Dear Father John, I am a convert to the Catholic faith, and I still have difficulties with Mary.  Don’t get me wrong – I believe all the dogma and doctrine fully, but when it comes to praying to Mary, I don’t seem to get it.  What role is she supposed to have in my pursuit of holiness and spiritual growth?

A: We have already looked briefly at the source of Mary’s greatness and the power of her presence.  Now we are ready to look at the two other ways she exercises her spiritual motherhood in our lives: her example of holiness and her prayerful intercession on our behalf.

Mary Shows Us the Way

The popes and the most revered spiritual writers throughout the centuries have all emphasized Mary’s example above every other aspect of Marian devotion.  She, the first Christian, is also the model Christian.  Throughout the Gospels, she is very discrete.  She never tries to steal the spotlight from her son and Lord, yet her own role cannot be ignored.  As she serves and follows Jesus, she shows us, with great simplicity, how to do the same.  When the Archangel Gabriel brings the message of the Annunciation, she shows us the beauty and force of virtues like humility, obedience, and trust in God.  When she speeds off to help her elderly cousin Elizabeth with her pregnancy and birth, and when she saves the wedding at Cana from social disaster, she shows us what true, self-forgetful, creative charity really looks like.  With the words of the Magnificat, she shows us what it really means for a creature to love and praise her Creator.  As she gathers with the frightened Apostles in the Upper Room, waiting for the Holy Spirit, she embodies the virtue of prayer and love for the Church.  Perhaps most eloquently of all, as she stands at the foot of the cross and accompanies Jesus to the bitter end of his passion, she reveals the true countenance of faith, courage, patience, and perseverance.

It is easy to list her exemplary virtues.  But to benefit from them, we have to do more than read the list.  We have to meditate on her words and example, giving them space to resonate in our hearts.  Like tiger cubs, we have to watch our Mother vanquish our spiritual enemies so as to learn how to do the same.

I recently received an email from a friend who described a painful situation.  A relative had committed suicide, causing shockwaves throughout the large extended family.  My friend made a beautiful comment on the challenge of dealing with that, a comment which impressed me deeply: “I can’t imagine Mary’s Agony of the loss of Jesus. Jesus gives way beyond my comprehension. There is so much to learn and I only feel I am skimming the surface. I pray to do his will.”  In the midst of that suffering and pain, it was Mary’s example that shone like a bright moon on a cold, dark night, giving hope and strength.  Mary is not invoked by Catholics as “Star of the Sea” for nothing.

Mary Prays for Us

Besides her presence and her example, we also need to learn to depend on her intercession.  The “pray for us, O Holy Mother of God” that we recite in the Hail Mary is the model of a child’s confident plea.  We should expect great things from the mother of our Lord, who is also our mother in the order of grace.  It is no coincidence that in the game of Chess as played in the Western world, the Queen is the most powerful piece on the board.  According to most Chess historians, the game originated in India, and was popularized in Persia and Arabia before coming into Europe through Muslim Spain in the Middle Ages.  In the Indian version, the Queen piece could only move one square, and in fact it was not named Queen at all – it was called the Mantri, or minister.  But as the game took on its modern form in Catholic Europe, the piece next to the King became more powerful and was renamed the Queen.  At the same time, the magnificent medieval cathedrals were being constructed, often named in honor of “Our Lady” (Notre Dame), the Blessed Virgin.  The concept of a good and powerful Queen who would look after her subjects’ needs in the King’s court was tightly entwined with the longstanding role that Mary had played in the Church (the earliest recorded extra-biblical Christian prayer is a prayer asking for protection from the Blessed Virgin Mary, the sub tuum presidium).  When Jesus was dying on the cross, he entrusted John, the representative of the whole future Church, to Mary’s care.  And ever since then, Christians have leaned, happily and fruitfully, on Mary’s intercession.

In a recent discourse, Pope Benedict XVI recalled this intercessory role when he commented on the life of St. Germanus of Constantinople.  In the eighth century, that city, which had been the capital of the Christian Roman Empire since 325 AD, was under siege by Muslim armies.  The siege lasted an entire year, and only the holy Patriarch was able to convince the emperor to keep up his resistance.  Every day during the siege, St. Germanus led a religious procession along the battlements all along the city walls.  In the procession, the faithful prayed and sang, carrying in honor a relic of the True Cross (the cross on which Jesus was crucified) and an image of the Mary, the Mother of God.  “In fact,” Pope Benedict explained, “Constantinople was liberated from the besiegement. The adversaries decided to permanently let go of the idea of establishing their capital in the city that was the symbol of the Christian empire, and the appreciation for divine help was extremely great among the people” (Wednesday Catechesis, 29 April 2009).  This is only one of countless examples of the power of Mary’s intercession on our behalf.

Her presence, her example, her intercession – these are the three pillars of Marian devotion, the three ways in which she wants to have a role in our spiritual growth.  In our next post, we’ll get practical and list a few ways to let her do that.

Yours in Christ, Father John Bartunek, LC

I am a convert and am struggling with the idea of praying to Mary, can you help? – Part IV

Q: Father John, I am a convert to the Catholic faith, and I still have difficulties with Mary.  Don’t get me wrong – I believe all the dogma and doctrine fully, but when it comes to praying to Mary, I don’t seem to get it.  What role is she supposed to have in my pursuit of holiness and spiritual growth?

A: She has the role of helping you cling more closely to her Son, Jesus Christ – that’s what first examined, the theological underpinning of Marian devotion.  And she exercises that role in three ways, as we have seen: by her presence, her example, and her intercession.  Now we are ready to drill down to the practical level.  What can we do, concretely, to live this Marian devotion fruitfully, to allow our mother in the order of grace to nurture, guide, and protect our spiritual growth?  Here we arrive, finally, to the most obvious and familiar aspect, Marian devotions. Marian devotions are the many different ways that individual Catholics can engage in a healthy Marian devotion.

The distinction between devotion and devotions is crucial.  Catholics are not superstitious.  We do not engage in ritual or pious practices as if they were magical formulae.  Our devotions give form to our devotion, just as a birthday cake gives form to our appreciation of a loved one’s existence.  Without the sincere appreciation, the cake would have no meaning.  If we engage in specific Marian devotions without plugging into the deeper theological source that gives them meaning, these practices can become distractions or even temptations that actually hinder our spiritual growth.

Having given that warning, we are ready to mention some common Marian devotions that, when lived rightly, allow the Blessed Virgin to fulfill her role in our pursuit of holiness.

Categories of Marian Devotions

The numerous Marian devotions that have arisen and flourished in the Church can be grouped into several categories.  The most common and obvious category are the prayers.  Praying to Mary (not worshipping her as if she were a goddess, but acknowledging her presence, admiring her example, and asking for her intercession) is the most direct and common form of Marian devotion.  And among the prayers, the Rosary holds first place.   Almost every pope since 1900 has written an encyclical letter encouraging Catholics to make use of this devotion.  The Memorare, the Sub tuum presiduum, the Angelus, and the Regina Caeli are other favorite Marian prayers.  We could write an entire post on each one, examining its meaning and its history.  Many lesser known Marian prayers exist as well, especially novenas and individual prayers composed by saints and popes.  These are vocal prayers (except the Rosary, which is a combination of vocal and mental prayer), and we pray them well in the same way that we pray all vocal prayers well.

Another category of Marian devotions consists of Marian shrines.  By making a visit or a pilgrimage to a Church-approved shrine, we can give our Marian devotion a turbo boost.  Shrines are sometimes linked to Marian apparitions (e.g., Our Lady of Fatima, Our Lady of Lourdes) or artistic/miraculous images of Mary (e.g. Our Lady of Czestochowa, Our Lady of Chiquinquira, Our Lady of Guadalupe).  The history of these events, places, and images offer eloquent (and sometimes downright awe-inspiring) testimonies of Mary’s active role in leading her spiritual children closer to the Lord.  Every year, they inspire and renew the hearts and minds of millions of visitors and pilgrims.

On a day-to-day level, Catholics have long used household images to channel their Marian devotion.  Reproductions of famous and powerful religious paintings and statues adorn living rooms, bedrooms, laundry rooms, dashboards, lockers, workshops, barber shops, restaurants, yards, road-side chapels, screen-savers, cell phone wallpaper, street corners, hospitals, prisons, and even casinos throughout the world.  The mere fact of such ubiquity illustrates, to some extent, the powerful and inescapable role of the Blessed Virgin Mary in the life of Christ’s Church.  Most parish churches will also have a prominent Marian image, either close to the sanctuary or in a side chapel.  Glancing at these images, or even spending a few moments now and again contemplating them or praying to Mary in front of them (this is often called “making a visit to the Blessed Virgin Mary”), allows Mary’s spiritual motherhood to work in our lives.

Getting Personal

For someone who has not developed a favorite form of Marian devotion, this variety of devotions may seem overwhelming.  Don’t worry!  None of us is called to engage in all of these devotions, though all of us are called to develop Marian devotion.  The key is to find one or two devotions that help you live the devotion fruitfully.  If you are at level zero, I would recommend starting to pray the Rosary, one decade every day (this Rosary booklet may be of assistance).  If you are looking to deepen your devotion, you may want to arrange a mini-pilgrimage to a local Marian shrine for your family, for a group of families, or maybe even for yourself.  An annual Marian pilgrimage, especially during the month of May (a month in which, traditionally, Catholics give special attention to Marian devotion), is an effective way to weave Catholic traditions into the fabric of family life.

I hope these series of posts have helped answer your question and put your mind at ease about the role Mary is meant to have in our great adventure of following Christ and building his Church.  But if it hasn’t, don’t worry; there’s no rush.  By seeking Christ in and through his Catholic Church, you will eventually come to know, love, and feel very comfortable with the Mother of our Lord.

Yours in Christ, Father John Bartunek, LC