St. Teresa – Prayer and reflection on mortification

“Why O Lord, should I be preoccupied with my fears and lose courage in the face of my weakness? You give me to understand that I must fortify myself in humility, and convince myself that I can do very little alone, and that without your help I am nothing. I shall put all my confidence in your mercy, and shall distrust my own strength, convinced that my weakness is caused by my self-reliance. You teach me not to be astonished at my struggle, for when a soul wishes to give itself over to mortification, it encounters difficulties on all sides. Does it wish to give up its ease? What a hardship! To scorn a point of honor? What a torture! To endure harsh words? Intolerable suffering! In short, it becomes filled with extreme sadness, but as soon as it resolved to die to the world, every anguish is at an end.”

Saint Teresa of Jesus

49. Forced by Faith (Mt 15:21-28)

“Thanks be to you, my Lord Jesus Christ, for all the blessings and benefits which you have given me, for all the pains and insults you have borne for me. O most merciful friend, my brother and redeemer, grant that I may know you more clearly, love you more dearly, and follow you more nearly, day by day, day by day. Amen.”

- St Richard of Chichester

Matthew 15:21-28

Jesus left that place and withdrew to the region of Tyre and Sidon. Then out came a Canaanite woman from that district and started shouting, ‘Sir, Son of David, take pity on me. My daughter is tormented by a devil.’ But he answered her not a word. And his disciples went and pleaded with him. ‘Give her what she wants,’ they said ‘because she is shouting after us.’ He said in reply, ‘I was sent only to the lost sheep of the House of Israel.’ But the woman had come up and was kneeling at his feet. ‘Lord,’ she said ‘help me.’ He replied, ‘It is not fair to take the children’s food and throw it to the house-dogs.’ She retorted, ‘Ah yes, sir; but even house-dogs can eat the scraps that fall from their master’s table.’ Then Jesus answered her, ‘Woman, you have great faith. Let your wish be granted.’ And from that moment her daughter was well again.

Christ the Lord

Christ takes his small band of twelve Apostles away from Jewish lands into the Phoenician territory around the cities of Tyre and Sidon in order to put the final touches on their training before making his way back to Jerusalem to suffer his Passion. There he once again shows forth his power as he casts out a demon with merely a word.

The miracles of Christ are referred to in Scripture as “signs and wonders,” the same kind of signs and wonders that manifested God’s presence in the Old Testament. They show that Christ is of God, that God is at work in Christ, and they are meant to stir up faith in him. Someone who demonstrates such power, and who wields it with such self-restraint, must either be accepted as God’s messenger or rejected as the devil’s lackey, but he should not be ignored. All three reactions appear in the Gospels; which corresponds to our own?

Christ the Teacher

The heart of God can be moved. Jesus had a particular mission to accomplish; the age of the universal Church was still waiting in the wings while he worked among the Jews. The parameters of this mission did not include Canaanites (ancestral enemies of the Israelites). But the woman had what Christ’s heart yearns for: love, faith, and humility.

She was seeking a miracle not for herself, but for the sake of her beloved daughter and at her own expense (imagine how humiliating it would be to tag along behind a Jewish rabbi in public screaming to get his attention). And she believed in Christ. It is hard to imagine how she had come to believe in him. Perhaps her initial faith was quite small (she calls him “Son of David,” which could be a merely political title), but contact with him increased it – at last she came, “kneeling at his feet,” as to a divinity. In any case, she knew that he could do it. She also knew that he would not do it because she deserved it, but simply because he cared. She was not angry with God for sending this trial; she did not come to Jesus furiously demanding justice. She accepted the trial and recognized that the miracle would be no less a gift than existence itself. This enabled her to take the rebuff and come right back with another petition to the Lord.

Love, faith, and humility: these are the secret ingredients for prayer that moves the heart of God – even a prayer as simple as, “Lord, help me.”

Christ the Friend

The dialogue between Jesus and the Canaanite woman shows how eager Christ is to fill us with the joy of his Kingdom. His objection to the woman’s first petition must not have been too strenuous; at least, she saw something in his eyes or heard something in his voice that encouraged her to persevere. Even the harsh insult he levels against her seems designed to elicit an even greater act of faith than she had already made. (We should note that it is possible to say harsh things in a gentle way, which may have been the case here.) The bottom line is that Christ was willing to be convinced; he allowed her faith to change his agenda, something even friends are rarely able to do. This flexibility shows the readiness of his love.

The Canaanite Woman: I had almost given up hope, but then he smiled at me and told me that my prayer was answered. He did it so simply. I was silenced. I looked up at him, hardly believing what he had said. In fact, I didn’t really believe it. While I was hurrying home I was wondering, hoping that my daughter was saved, but still wondering. I guess I thought he would perform the miracle with some drama, or that he would come to my home. But it was enough for him to will to do it. When I finally reached my little house, I hesitated to go in. Could it really be true? I pulled aside the curtain and looked at my little daughter lying on the mat. She was sleeping peacefully, her face relaxed, her breathing regular. She was healed. I knelt down and embraced her. Through my tears I prayed in thanksgiving to Jesus.

Christ in My Life

How different this woman is from the Pharisees! How it must have gladdened your heart to find someone so humble, someone so trusting in you, after those long and fruitless discussions with the self-righteous Pharisees. Lord Jesus, teach me to be humble. Teach me to pray from my heart. Show me how to let your grace enlighten my mind and enliven my will…

You always hear my prayers. Why don’t I pray more? I don’t deserve your mercy and grace, but I do need them, and I know you want to give them. Help me to want the right things, to implore your help for the people I love. I can’t give them everything they need, but you can. Here me now as I pray for these people. Make me a channel of your peace…

A Christian is supposed to follow in your footsteps. I wonder if there is someone in my life who is insistently crying out to me for help, and I simply don’t realize it. You have given me so much. Give me one more thing: an eagerness to share all I have received with others who need it. With the love of your heart, Lord, inflame my heart…

Yours in Christ, Father John Bartunek, LC

PS: To learn more about The Better Part – A Christ-Centered Resource for Personal Prayer, click HERE.

48. Hypocritical Hearts (Mt 15:1-20)

“The humble resemble a rock. Even though the rock lies downward, it is nevertheless firm. The proud are like smoke. Even though the smoke is lofty, eventually it disappears.”

- St Augustine

Matthew 15:1-20

Pharisees and scribes from Jerusalem then came to Jesus and said, ‘Why do your disciples break away from the tradition of the elders? They do not wash their hands when they eat food.’ ‘And why do you’ he answered ‘break away from the commandment of God for the sake of your tradition? For God said: Do your duty to your father and mother and: Anyone who curses father or mother must be put to death. But you say, If anyone says to his father or mother: Anything I have that I might have used to help you is dedicated to God, he is rid of his duty to father or mother. In this way you have made God’s word null and void by means of your tradition. Hypocrites! It was you Isaiah meant when he so rightly prophesied: This people honours me only with lip-service, while their hearts are far from me. The worship they offer me is worthless; the doctrines they teach are only human regulations.’ He called the people to him and said, ‘Listen, and understand. What goes into the mouth does not make a man unclean; it is what comes out of the mouth that makes him unclean.’

Then the disciples came to him and said, ‘Do you know that the Pharisees were shocked when they heard what you said?’ He replied, ‘Any plant my heavenly Father has not planted will be pulled up by the roots. Leave them alone. They are blind men leading blind men; and if one blind man leads another, both will fall into a pit.’ At this, Peter said to him, ‘Explain the parable for us’. Jesus replied, ‘Do even you not yet understand? Can you not see that whatever goes into the mouth passes through the stomach and is discharged into the sewer? But the things that come out of the mouth come from the heart, and it is these that make a man unclean. For from the heart come evil intentions: murder, adultery, fornication, theft, perjury, slander. These are the things that make a man unclean. But to eat with unwashed hands does not make a man unclean.’

Christ the Lord

Jesus shows once again that he is a merciful Lord. Instead of ignoring his Pharisaic interlocutors, he instructs them, hoping that maybe this time some light will penetrate their self-imposed, self-righteous blindness.

In the first place, he does for them what they can no longer do on their own: an examination of conscience. He points out that in their pursuit of legalistic and ritualistic exactitude, they have let selfishness run wild. Many religious leaders at the time had taken to dedicating their property and their wealth to the Temple, supposedly as sign of devotion. This gave them continued use of their possessions for the time being (until death, when it would revert to the Temple treasurers). It also meant that they had a good excuse not to use their wealth to support their aging parents – that would be an illicit profanation of sacred property. It was a convenient loophole that saved them a lot of trouble and inconvenience, while looking to all the world like a pious and commendable sacrifice. Jesus exposes their hypocrisy: they have preferred their own rabbinical practices (human tradition) to a clear precept of the Mosaic Law (divine revelation) purely out of self-interest.

Jesus always exposes our hypocrisy. We may ignore or dim or try to drown out the voice of conscience, but as long as we walk this earth, God continues to speak to our hearts in one way or another. It is the voice of the Lord, who knows us through and through, and longs for us to submit to his wise and redeeming lordship now, so we can enjoy eternal life in his Kingdom later.

Christ the Teacher

For the ancient Jews, there were two types of realities, the sacred and the profane. The Chosen People, because of the special privileges granted them by the one true God, had unique access to the sacred, that which belonged to God, the Holy One of Israel. They had his sacred Temple, a sacred priesthood, the sacred scriptures, and the Law, which governed both worship and behavior. At the same time, they lived in the midst of a fallen, profane world. As a result, they were constantly moving back and forth between the sacred and the profane. To help keep the proper attitudes amid this transit, the rabbinical schools had developed thousands of small traditions, related to but not stipulated by the divinely revealed Mosaic Law. Palestine’s religious leaders at the time of Jesus followed all of these traditions minutely, and were therefore called Pharisees, or “the perfect.” Among these traditions were many that had to do with ritual washings before eating. These were the ones the Pharisees accuse Jesus and his disciples of neglecting.

Jesus’ response elevates the argument. He points out, once again, that the Pharisees have inverted real religion. Religion is not about rituals, it’s about a relationship with God – friendship with and fidelity to the Lord and Creator lived out through obedience to his will. External, physical realities don’t determine whether someone is in communion with the sacred – rather, the attitude and decisions of the heart do. The Pharisees don’t love God; they love themselves and their pious prowess. Jesus invites them to take care of their souls by loving God and deciding to do what is right and pleasing to him, not by worrying over empty, man-made traditions.

Christ the Friend

Jesus seeks our hearts. What pains him about the Pharisees is that their hearts are far from him. The heart – the place where we decide if we will be self-indulgent or self-giving, where we decide to accept or reject Christ’s offer of friendship – the heart is the stage of the human drama. When Christ looks at us, he looks with love, but also with a smattering of anxiety: will we opt for him? Will we let his saving love guide us through life? It’s a decision he cares about more than any other, and it’s the only one that he can never make.

Yours in Christ, Father John Bartunek, LC

PS: To learn more about The Better Part – A Christ-Centered Resource for Personal Prayer, click HERE.

47. Why Do We Doubt? (Mt 14:22-36)

“If I try by myself to swim across the ocean of this world, the waves will certainly engulf me. In order to survive I must climb aboard a ship made of wood; this wood is the Cross of Christ. Of course, even on board ship there will be dangerous tempests and perils from the sea of this world. But God will help me remain on board the ship and arrive safely at the harbor of eternal life.”

- St Augustine

Matthew 14: 22-33

Directly after this he made the disciples get into the boat and go on ahead to the other side while he would send the crowds away. After sending the crowds away he went up into the hills by himself to pray. When evening came, he was there alone, while the boat, by now far out on the lake, was battling with a heavy sea, for there was a head-wind. In the fourth watch of the night he went towards them, walking on the lake, and when the disciples saw him walking on the lake they were terrified. ‘It is a ghost’ they said, and cried out in fear. But at once Jesus called out to them, saying, ‘Courage! It is I! Do not be afraid.’ It was Peter who answered. ‘Lord,’ he said ‘if it is you, tell me to come to you across the water.’ ‘Come’ said Jesus. Then Peter got out of the boat and started walking towards Jesus across the water, but as soon as he felt the force of the wind, he took fright and began to sink. ‘Lord! Save me!’ he cried. Jesus put out his hand at once and held him. ‘Man of little faith,’ he said, ‘why did you doubt?’ And as they got into the boat the wind dropped. The men in the boat bowed down before him and said, ‘Truly, you are the Son of God.’

Having made the crossing, they came to land at Gennesaret. When the local people recognised him they spread the news through the whole neighbourhood and took all that were sick to him, begging him just to let them touch the fringe of his cloak. And all those who touched it were completely cured.

Christ the Lord

A few hours earlier, Jesus had demonstrated his divine power by the miraculous multiplication of the loaves. As his disciples struggle to keep afloat in the midst of one of the Sea of Galilee’s characteristic storms, which arise suddenly and progress violently due to the peculiar geography of the region, Jesus gives them more signs of his divinity: walking on the water, enabling Peter to walk on the water, and calming the gale as suddenly as nature had stirred it up. The reaction of the astonished Apostles leaves no room to doubt the extraordinary quality of this encounter: they “bowed down before him” and acknowledged him as the Messiah. If we take enough time to contemplate the episode, we will find ourselves doing the same.

Christ the Teacher

The incident overflows with lessons for the attentive Christian. First of all, the Church has long viewed the back-to-back miracles having to do with bread (multiplication of the loaves) and with Christ’s body (walking on the water) as a preface to the mystery of the Eucharist, the ongoing miracle involving bread and Christ’s body. Just as the Apostles share in these two miracles – they distributed the miraculously multiplying loaves, and Peter walks on the water – so through the Eucharist all Christians will come to share in the transforming power of divine grace. Christ proves he has power over elemental objects and material forces; why could he not have that same power to turn bread and wine into his own body through the hands of his Apostles?

Secondly, Christ teaches us by example the importance of spending time in prayer. St Matthew notes how Jesus went up into the hills by himself to pray. Before the miracle of the loaves, Christ had received news of John the Baptist’s martyrdom and had attempted to go off by himself to reflect and pray in its aftermath, but the needs of the crowds deterred him. Nevertheless, here we see that although he delayed his time alone with his Father, he did not let his busy schedule crowd it out altogether. As soon as he could, he retreated into the quiet of prayer. Jesus teaches us to keep first things first; if he who is the Son of God needed time alone in prayer, how much more do we!

Thirdly, Christ uses Peter’s impulsiveness to teach us the secret of navigating through the winds and waves of life. As long as Peter kept his eyes on Christ he was able to walk unhindered through the stormy sea; as soon as he let his eyes wander away from Christ to examine the intimidating waves, he began to sink. Just so, as we strive to make our way to Christ through the stormy temptations and challenges of life in a fallen world, focusing on Christ is the only way to keep afloat.

Christ the Friend

Christ never abandons us in our need; he only asks us to believe in him. In his words to Peter, tinged perhaps with disappointment, we catch a glimpse of his heart, longing so deeply for us to trust him without limits: “Why did you doubt?” And when he steps into the boat, the storm dies away and peace resumes. Christ wants to be our peace, our strength, and our solution to all of life’s troubles. As the continued healings St Matthew mentions at the end of the chapter attest, he wants to accompany us on each stage of our life’s journey. St Peter learned this lesson well; in his first Letter he put it like this: “cast all your anxieties on him, for he cares about you” (1 Peter 5:7).

Peter: How could I ever forget that night? We were terrified. Have you ever seen someone walking across the stormy waters right next to your boat? When we heard his voice telling us to take courage, I felt a surge of recognition and confidence, but when I looked into the others’ faces, I could tell they didn’t know what to think. That’s when I got the idea to have him call me to walk on the waters with him, to put everyone’s fears to rest. And I did! I walked on the stormy sea. Who had ever heard of such a thing? After a few steps, as the boat retreated farther behind me, I began to notice how great the storm really was. That’s when I took my eyes off the Lord. Whenever I took my eyes off him, I always got in trouble. I started to sink. The whole world was caving in on me. I could barely even cry out for help. But he was there. He was always there. He never gave up on me. He believed in me even when I didn’t believe in him, or in myself.

Christ in My Life

Why did you need to pray, Lord? You were God! But you did need to pray. Do I feel such a need to pray? Am I willing to sacrifice other things in order to make sure I spend time with you? Why am I not more concerned about learning to pray better? Jesus, you want me to pray. I want to pray better, so that I can love you better. Teach me, Lord, to pray. Thy will be done…

That boat was the infant Church, with Peter at the helm. It struggled then, and your Church still struggles today. Lord, give strength and prudence to our Pope, to the bishops, to the priests and consecrated men and women, and to the laity. Grant saintly priests to the world. Take us by the hand, save us, increase our faith, calm the storms. Never let me be separated from you…

You always saw the needs of others and went out to meet them. Why I am so slow to do good, especially with those who are near to me? My heart goes in slow motion sometimes, weighed down by my immense selfishness. Your grace can change me. Jesus, meek and humble of heart, with the zeal of your heart inflame my heart…

Yours in Christ, Father John Bartunek, LC

PS: To learn more about The Better Part – A Christ-Centered Resource for Personal Prayer, click HERE.

46. Self-Forgetting Love (Mt 14:13-21)

“I love because I love; I love by loving.”

- St Bernard of Clairveaux

Matthew 14:13-21

When Jesus received this news he withdrew by boat to a lonely place where they could be by themselves. But the people heard of this and, leaving the towns, went after him on foot. So as he stepped ashore he saw a large crowd; and he took pity on them and healed their sick. When evening came, the disciples went to him and said, ‘This is a lonely place, and the time has slipped by; so send the people away, and they can go to the villages to buy themselves some food’. Jesus replied, ‘There is no need for them to go: give them something to eat yourselves’. But they answered ‘All we have with us is five loaves and two fish’. ‘Bring them here to me’ he said. He gave orders that the people were to sit down on the grass; then he took the five loaves and the two fish, raised his eyes to heaven and said the blessing. And breaking the loaves handed them to his disciples who gave them to the crowds. They all ate as much as they wanted, and they collected the scraps remaining; twelve baskets full. Those who ate numbered about five thousand men, to say nothing of women and children.

Christ the Lord

John the Baptist’s death moves Jesus deeply. Not only had they been cousins, and men who shared a deep common bond of dedication to God’s Kingdom, but John’s death was for Christ a signal that his own ministry was to rise to another level: the Precursor had finished his mission; the King was now to arrive. Christ’s heart was heavy with sorrow for John’s tragic death, and his mind was full of its consequences. He goes away to be alone, to have time to reflect and to pray as he begins a new stage of his mission.

But the crowds won’t leave him alone; they give him no space. They flock around him, begging and pleading for him to heal them and teach them and save them from all their troubles. Christ cannot resist their pleas. He sits down and begins to give audience to the throngs of people; his disciples bring each plaintiff into his presence, he hears them, and he heals their diseases. All day he is there, listening, teaching, and healing – all day he pours out his love on these needy crowds, when what he had planned to do was go off on his own to reflect and pray. Our Lord truly is a man for others.

Christ the Teacher

Finally, his exhausted and exasperated disciples try to get him to send away the hungry throng, as much for the sake of the people (who need to eat) as for their own sake, so they can have a break. But Christ wants to teach them a lesson: just as the Son of Man (Jesus) has come to serve, to give and not to count the cost, so his followers must do the same. “Feed them yourselves,” he quips. Imagine the look on the disciples’ faces! Five thousand men, with another few thousand women and children, and the Master tells the Apostles to give them a meal. They point out that they really have barely enough food even for themselves, let alone to feed thousands of hungry hangers-on. But however little they have, when they put it into the hands of the Lord it becomes more than enough.

St Matthew emphasizes Christ’s example of self-forgetting love in this episode by drawing a parallel between it and the culmination of Jesus’ self-giving, the Eucharist. The four verbs that describe what Jesus does with the five loaves in this scene are the same four verbs that describe what Jesus does with the bread that becomes his body during the Last Supper – the same ones every priest still uses today in the sacrifice of the Mass: took… blessed… broke… gave. It is a summary of Christian theology. Jesus did that with human nature: taking flesh, praying to his Father, suffering his passion, and spreading the Good News. He does it with each of his disciples: he calls them, pours out his grace on them, gives them a share in the cross, and sends them into the world to make more disciples. The Eucharist is Christ’s ongoing love affair with the souls for whom he died, and it makes what it teaches (self-forgetting love) actually happen in those who receive it with faith.

Christ the Friend

Jesus: My heart thirsts for those who are thirsty. I hunger for those who hunger. I want to feed those who are hungry; I want to heal those who are sick; I want to teach those who are confused. This is why I came, to put my omnipotence, my goodness, and my wisdom at the service of others. But I don’t want to do everything myself. I choose apostles to work with me, because I want to bring all people together into my Kingdom, to make all people full, active citizens. In wisdom and love I choose to need the generosity of those whom I call to follow me: the successors of the apostles (the Pope and the bishops in union with him) and through them priests, consecrated men and women, and all Christians. If each of my followers will give me what little they have, I will multiply it, I will make it feed the starving masses, with both food for their bodies and for their souls. No matter how little it seems you can do, I want you to do it, and I will take care of making it overflow into eternity.

Christ in My Life

I have benefited from your self-forgetting love, your pity, and your generosity. Even when I was too self-absorbed to look for help, you have come to my aid. Thank you, Lord. Now teach me to do the same with those around me. Teach me to forget myself, to put all my talents and treasure and time at the service of your Kingdom, out of love for you and for my neighbor. Nothing else will last…

If you have left us the great gift of the Eucharist, it’s because we need it. Do I live as if I need it? Why do I take it for granted so much? Why don’t I visit you more often? Why don’t I speak about this gift with those who are searching for you? Increase my faith, Lord. Teach me the lessons you have hidden in the Eucharist – the ones that are there just for me. I believe in your love; make me love like you…

You have given me so much, Lord, and I have been so stingy in giving myself to you. I have a few loaves and a few fish – right now I put them into your hands. You want me to work with you to build up your Kingdom; it seems too tall a task for someone so small as myself. If anyone else were asking it of me, I would have no hope, but I believe in the power of my nothingness united to your omnipotence…

Yours in Christ, Father John Bartunek, LC