Catechism – Contemplative Prayer – 2715

Contemplation is a gaze of faith, fixed on Jesus. “I look at him and he looks at me”: this is what a certain peasant of Ars in the time of his holy curé used to say while praying before the tabernacle. This focus on Jesus is a renunciation of self. His gaze purifies our heart; the light of the countenance of Jesus illumines the eyes of our heart and teaches us to see everything in the light of his truth and his compassion for all men. Contemplation also turns its gaze on the mysteries of the life of Christ. Thus it learns the “interior knowledge of our Lord,” the more to love him and follow him.

Catechism – Contemplative Prayer – 2714

Contemplative prayer is also the pre-eminently intense time of prayer. In it the Father strengthens our inner being with power through his Spirit “that Christ may dwell in [our] hearts through faith” and we may be “grounded in love.”

Reflections on Mary’s Pond – Gratitude

In the midst of the eighteen year storm of my childhood, there were brief reprieves. Some of these came when my father would break away from his incredibly busy work schedule and take us fishing. Mostly alone in the mountains following some meandering brook in the hopes of finding a larger-than-life fish in a small stream was safe, and it caused the tumult at home to fade, at least for a while.

It was during these times that I learned to love the relative safety of aloneness, along with the mystery and beauty of clear cool water. The melody of a babbling stream as it forms from the base of a snow bank, cuts through meadows, pushes up flowers, is breathtaking – particularly when it links to a fish-filled lake where few cast shadows at that time of year.

Running water was and still is mesmerizing and life-giving to me. When Jesus says “I am the water of life” I have some intuitive sense of what he means.

So, when I knew that we were moving to Birmingham I prayed. It was a childish prayer. I asked Mary if she would intercede on our behalf that we could find a home with a stream. I knew we couldn’t afford a house on that kind of property, but I prayed anyway. As it turns out, we weren’t able to find a home in our price range with a stream (not even close). I forgot the prayer as the busyness of moving overwhelmed every thought and ounce of energy.

We moved in to our new home, then the storm came. This was a rain storm mind you – Alabama style. That means lots of water in a short period of time. Our backyard was flooded. The rain eventually stopped and I expected everything to dry up, but the water kept coming.

Once it slowed a bit I squished around in the grass to try to find the source. I suspected it was runoff from our neighbors’ yards as they all live above us on a hill. To my surprise I discovered that the lawn was squishing in a more and more narrow pattern up the mild slope. Then it seemed to come to a single point. Now on my hands and knees, I pushed a finger into the grass. Water. A cool clear spring bubbled above the surface of the lawn and began to flow freely. I suspected it would stop eventually.

A year has passed and it is still flowing. But now the spring is at the bottom of a newly hand-excavated pond. Once the water is under control, I plan to build a grotto in honor of Mary and in appreciation for her gift of employment in Birmingham, for water, and for saying “yes” to the Water of Life.

How has Mary, in her life, and her intercession, blessed you?

Am I being self-absorbed when praying for spiritual growth?

Q: Can praying for spiritual growth indicate being self absorbed? I am troubled by my intercessory prayer.  I pray quite a bit for others but, I also pray a lot for myself. I pray that I grow in faith, that I love and see others as Christ sees them, etc. Still, I wonder if I am too focused on self. These thoughts have become distractions in prayer and in Mass. In Mass, as I was thinking on this, I even wondered if I should fast from self prayer and pray only for others. In adoration, I wondered if that was a temptation rather than of God. What do I do with these thoughts?

A: Asking for good things from God is one of the most basic forms of prayer that we have. Jesus himself encouraged us to do this – over and over again! My favorite is: “Ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you” (Matthew 7:7). In the Jewish mindset, repeating the same concept three times in a row, changing only the words, was a mode of emphasis. Jesus wants us to desire, ask for, and pursue all the good things we need, most especially the graces of spiritual growth. The thoughts that are making you want to stop asking for these good things cannot, I think, come from the Holy Spirit. They are distractions. Two observations may help you avoid getting tangled up in them as you continue to seek union with God in prayer.

Partnering with God

First, remember that God has decided to require our partnership in the building up of his Kingdom. On the one hand, without God’s grace we “can do nothing” (John 15:5). But on the other hand, Jesus has given us work to do in his Kingdom. He has commanded us to follow him, to obey him, to seek to be his witnesses and spread his teaching “to the ends of the earth” (Acts 1:8). St. Paul understood this so well. He wrote to Christians in Corinth: “But by the grace of God I am what I am, and His grace toward me did not prove vain; but I labored even more than all of them, yet not I, but the grace of God with me” (1 Corinthians 15:10).

Prayer and Action Should Be in Harmony

This means that while our prayer should be fervent and heartfelt, we can always test its sincerity by looking at our actions. If we pray “Thy Kingdom come!” sincerely, then in our actions we will try to second that prayer, to reiterate it. We will make a decent effort to speak and behave in ways that are pleasing to God and that will help bring God’s light into this darkened world.

And so, when you find yourself badgered by doubts about whether you are being too demanding in your petitions to God, reflect on your actions. Are you doing your part to cooperate with the grace God is sending you? Are you working hard to avoid sin and the occasions of sin? Are you living the sacraments, practicing mental prayer, carrying your cross with faith, seeking to fulfill the duties of your state in life, finding ways to build up your neighbor and serve those in need?… A clean conscience will assure you that you are not being hypocritical in your petitions to our Lord. Of course, you will never be impeccable in your actions; the important thing is to make a decent effort, day after day.

Why Prayer of Petition Is Pleasing to God

Second, remember the reasons that the prayer of petition is so pleasing to God. When we approach God our Father and voice our needs to him, we are exercising all the most beautiful and powerful Christian virtues. We are exercising profound humility by acknowledging that we need God, that we can’t do it on our own. We are expressing our faith in God’s existence and interest in us. We are expressing our trust in his goodness towards us. We are expressing our love for him – our desire to live in a closer and closer union with him in all things. The prayer of petition (this is when we “intercede” for our own needs; usually, the term “prayer of intercession” refers specifically to praying for the needs of others) is an exquisite bouquet of multifarious love, and we should never hesitate to continue begging God our Father to pour his grace into our hearts.

The Catechism makes this abundantly clear (#2629): “The vocabulary of supplication in the New Testament is rich in shades of meaning: ask, beseech, plead, invoke, entreat, cry out, even “struggle in prayer” (cf. Romans 15:30, Colossians 4:12). Its most usual form, because the most spontaneous, is petition: by prayer of petition we express awareness of our relationship with God. We are creatures who are not our own beginning, not the masters of adversity, not our own last end. We are sinners who as Christians know that we have turned away from our Father. Our petition is already a turning back to him.”

Remembering that the prayer of petition gives glory to God should help you deflect the distractions and doubts that you describe in your question.

A Final Thought

I can’t tell from your question whether or not you habitually engage in mental prayer. If you don’t, I would highly recommend that you give it a go. Not only is it the bread-and-butter for real spiritual growth, but it may also help you achieve a better balance between the different forms of prayer (praise, adoration, supplication, contrition, thanksgiving). The influence that the doubts and distractions have had in your prayer life may be partially due to a lack of that balance. Here is a link to a post that can get you started.

God bless you!

Catechism – Contemplative Prayer – 2709

What is contemplative prayer? St. Teresa answers: “Contemplative prayer [oracion mental] in my opinion is nothing else than a close sharing between friends; it means taking time frequently to be alone with him who we know loves us.” Contemplative prayer seeks him “whom my soul loves.” It is Jesus, and in him, the Father. We seek him, because to desire him is always the beginning of love, and we seek him in that pure faith which causes us to be born of him and to live in him. In this inner prayer we can still meditate, but our attention is fixed on the Lord himself.